Downsized In A Supersized World

I found out this past Tuesday morning that my job will be eliminated as of 6/30. Not just mine but the other 300 or so jobs the make up the whole department.

Watching my fellow employees go through this reminds of being around family when someone is in the hospital and expected to die soon. There is the good and the bad. There are those that pull together and those who freak out and go into the corner. There are those that lend an extra hand and those that scramble soley for their own self interest. I would put myself into all the categories right now.

I don't think our relationships truly define us. I do think that how we handle our relationships can. My job doesn't define me but how I relate to my job does. That's just a responsible way of approaching it for me.

Upon arrival to our job this Tuesday, we all saw the extra unfamiliar faces, extra security guards, cordoned off parts of the work space. We were all escorted to the big meeting room. The people in the room set to conduct the meeting pensive and strained faces. The writing was already on the wall long before a definte word was spoke.

Because of this the shock was less. In fact, except for a few people that cried, the level of comedy was high. People make jokes to deal with stress but it wasn't so much that. It was this "grave-side" humor that would regale Soviet Jews perhaps.

(e.g. Avram lies dying. "Sarah, are you here?" he asks. "Yes, I'm here." "Is Moishe here?" "Yes, he's here." "Is Rebecca here?" "She's here too." "Are the cousins here?" "Of course." "And all the grandchildren too?" "Here they are." "Then who's minding the store?")

For example: "I don't think that the strategically placed boxes of tissues are good sign." or, "If they were going to hire extra security they should have them them bring bagels." Amid comments about transfering to another department in the company someone said, "I think that would be like running from one end of the Titanic to the other."

So, I look at all the different faces changing on the same people. I briefly wonder what others see in me. Maybe they'll see what was always there. Although I have my own concerns I hope they see someone that is truly o.k. with the whole deal an is acting wisely. I also hope they know I am willing to listen and offer what I can.

We were given the option of taking the day off with pay or we could stay and work. At first, I was a bit disoriented. I thought about my wife and our pets, mostly. I sat down at my desk and pondered the choice set before me for that day. Someone turned on some music played it loud enough for us all to hear. It was something purposely happy to lift our spirits. That was a tender thing to do, I thought.

And the band played on.