When the Past Finds You

Ancient improbabilities can catch up with us in unexpected ways. In this present case the Ten Commandments came to mind the other night. I asked myself if I could recite all of them off the top of my head. Although I am no Bible scholar I assumed the time spent studying the Bible and being in church would pay off. Nope. I got to about six of them before I ran into a wall.

If a cross section of society were polled, I would expect that my experience would be statistically average or maybe even better. Accepting that premise, what is the big deal with them being posted in public places if most people won't remember them anyhow? But that is just a question I asked myself.

Many of them are pretty simple: Do not murder, Do not steal, Do not commit adultery, Don't lie about your neighbor, etc. Sure, some of the remaining ones may transcend secular comforts but there was one command in particular that caught me completely off guard.

Does the name Equus asinus ring any bells? In the English language, Equus asinus is know properly as an ass. Some people started calling them donkeys to avoid the unfortunate association with the old English word "arse"...the human backside region, if you know what I mean.

Nearby our home is a corral that is home to two asses. Cutest little things that you ever have seen! Have you ever stroked those adorable long ears while looking into their deep brown eyes? They are just about irresistible, darn it! My wife and I used to regularly stop and pet them when we first discovered them. Now, I just recently recalled all this but one time in particular months ago I was giving one a good rub between the eyes and I thought to myself, "I would really like to take these cute guys home with me!"

It wasn't until today that I realized I was coveting my neighbor's ass.

Sorry.